Overheard By Rach
“am waitin for me mate to bring me some weed, bet he’s sittin in the bogs somewhere gettin a suck off some heffer. am not messin, dat bird’s like a moose. she’ll just be mooin’ while she does it”
:’) Oh how I love Liverpool <3
“am waitin for me mate to bring me some weed, bet he’s sittin in the bogs somewhere gettin a suck off some heffer. am not messin, dat bird’s like a moose. she’ll just be mooin’ while she does it”
:’) Oh how I love Liverpool <3
I was in town and there was some smack’eds eating butter, and a few minutes later, 2 of them were arguing and all you heard was “YE WERNT SAYEN THA LAST NITE WHEN I SHAVED ME FANNY FOR YE”
And about 20 minutes later the police came on horses, and the smack’ed eating butter was stroking the horse and called the horse butters!
Me and my friend were in town one day after a girly shopping day, when we heard some smackheads talking to each other:
If you were a dog I’d put you down, ever since its all we can say to each other.
Me and my mates were on the bus on the way home from town. One of my friends kept pressing the stop button, making a tune out of it, and the bus driver shouted saying if she didn’t stop it we would get kicked off. She didn’t stop, so when we got to the next stop, the bus driver was like “alright, get off ya fuckin idiot”
Me mate went “it’s my stop anyway, mate.”
Overheard in the pub.
U now when it says dolphin friendly, do u think they actually put dolphin in tins of tuna?
Classical
I was on the bus into town one day and there were two girls sitting behind me:
Girl 1: ” eyy do animals go to school?”
Girl 2: ” erm.. yeah i think they do yanno”
Girl 1: ” Im being serious though do they really?”
Girl 2: ” im being serious too i think they have to do GCSE’s as well”
:’)
SWEET HAIRDO
Was on the 82 bus an a group of scals wer avin a Yer Ma battle at da back when one lad said eee lid fuck Yer Ma anyway look at the kip of your mop… looks lyk yav brushed ya hair wiv a toffee apple ya propa scetty meff!!!!
SCENT DA CELLS
Me an me mate were pulled by the police for a routine stop an the officer said do any of yas have anythin on you that you shudnt?? me mate instantly replied:
Yeah av gt me grandads aftershave on he’s gona go sick… the busy grabbed him by da neck an chucked him inda back of the police car!!! haha
Walking through Kenny once and these two scals were messing about. One of them trips the other up and shouts
“Ahhh ladd! You’re on the FLOOR!!”
The other jumps up proper angry and shouts
“So WHAT! Yer ma lays Kinder Eggs!!”