Post by Markus
The Zanzibar Club.
‘I’ve got fifty quid to last me all week and I know I’m going to spend sixty tonight.’
Medical Term
Overheard on the bus.
1. ‘What’s twitters bridge?’
2. ‘It’s that bit between yer arse and yer balls.’
Announcement!
One of our neighbours was pissed-off with her husband.
She opened the back door and shouted ‘Brian is a nob, everybody, Brian is total fucking nob.’
In Work
The boss catches his secretary using Twitter during office hours.
Boss in his best sarcastic tone; “You social noworking again?”
In Starsucks
Brother and sister meet up for a coffee.
Sister: I really like your shirt, Paul, is it new?
Brother: No Alison, it was a Christmas present off some dozy girl.
Sister: That’s not very nice! who was it?
Brother: You!
Social Network Merger!
I caught this gem on the Liverpool to Wigan train.
‘I can give you my e-mail or you can contact me on My Face.’
Post from Hannah
Phone call between my two mates. They were trying to meet at a pre-arranged location.
1. ‘Look, it’s really busy, you’re better off parking in a parallel street.’
2. ‘Whereabouts is parallel street?’
Heard by John
“You can have a ham and cheese toastie, or the vegetarian special”
“Whats the vegetarian special?”
“A Cheese toastie, but you could have the vegan special if you want it”
“Whats That?”
“Toast”
Heard by Laura
Overheard in the towney
1st Woman: hiya love, you alright?
2nd Woman: yeah you?
1st woman: did you hear about poor Hilda……. she died!!!
