Post by Aimee

This happened about 2 years ago but it still amuses me…

I was getting out of a taxi on Smithdown, some kid comes up to me and says “Give me your wallet!”

Him being about 12 years old I laugh at him and tell him to “F**K off!”

Kid: “There’s no need to swear!”

In work

Fella having a right old go at female co-worker.

Fella: You can’t do that it’s just not on. If you wanna take if further your going to have go and see John.

Girl: Alright, alright, roll yer neck in.

Overheard by Courtney

Heard this at a car booty in Tranmere last week.

Some fella had two dolls on his stall and a woman asked him how much they were. The fella said:

‘The crying one’s a fiver, and the pissing one’s four quid.’

Post by Bethany

I work in McDonalds and some woman asked me if we did miserable meals

I said I didn’t know what she meant.

The woman pointed to her young son and said: ‘Well, I’d get him a Happy Meal, but he’s been a miserable swine all day.’

Overheard by Warren

Kids on the bus in Norris Green:

Fuck off, lad, yer ma’s got six toes and she’s shagging yer Grandad.

Limo on Lime St.

A stretch limousine pulled up at the lights by Lime Street, and this lad opens the window and shouts to some girls:

‘Hey, girls, d’yer want a lift?’

One of the girls: ‘Where ya going?’

The lad: ‘Anywhere yer like.’

Girl: ‘Nah, it’s shit there.’

Post by Ste

We were in a lesson at college talking about the stupid slang terms people use:

Male student: ‘They say things like “Ya want beef.’

Teacher: ‘What do they mean by beef?’

Female student: ‘Ya know, beefs, it’s just beef innit?’

Overheard by Tony

Two girls on the bus.

Girl 1. ‘He’s started going out with that gorgeous girl from Aigburth.’

Girl 2. ‘She’s from Peru isn’t she?’

Girl 1. ‘Not sure, but somewhere in Africa.’