I remember being in the U n I Indian Restaurant on Renshaw St late one night, and for those of you who haven’t been there, the tables are in their own private booths with curtains for privacy. Me and BF were having our meal and there was a lull in the conversation and the music being played in there, and from the next booth I heard a female voice say
“I don’t care, I’m not doing it, I’m just not into anal sex!”
Talk about bad timing!
I was on the 86 once and some woman was yelling up the stairs at her daughter telling her it was time to get off, and I swear she called the poor kid Nokia..
2 lads in Greens Gym:
1: Eh la’ – have you seen me gym fob?
2: It’s on your ankle.
1: No la’ – that’s me tag.
I am a proud scouser living in London. When I first moved I was walking alone along the Edgware Road feeling a bit lonely. A very old, rusty limo drove past me and a scouse bloke popped his head out of the sun roof -
Limo scouser – “eh girl, have you won the lottery?”
Me – “er. no”
Limo scouser – “must be me then!!”
At which point the limo drove off.
This, of course, made me very happy and homesick – classic.
In Magalluf one night, my mate asked why the moon shines at night, after me explaining it’s the reflection from the sun etc, she goes on to ask… “so can you get sunburned off the moon?” Honestly!!!!
I was in Huyton village a few weeks back a boy about six was playing up in the post office and his mum said ‘CALUM PACK IT IN OR I’LL TAKE YER DUMMY OFF YER… AND… NOT GIVE IT YER BACK FOR A VERY LONG TIME!’
A woman was with who I can only assume her friend by the Subway on Whitechapel. It transpires that they were going to the bus stops on Sir Thomas Street. So, its really busy and there’s a load of buses coming down the street towards them, and one turns to the other and says “Quick, that looks like a bus!”
I thought it was worthy of a giggle.
Back when I was about 15 I was at the bus stop and inside the shetler were two lads.
“Haha Lad! Then what?”
“Well I’m going about 70mph the wrong way down this one way street, 2 bizzies cars after me and I do a 360 and dart across the park, nearly hit some prozzie and everything!”
“Haha Lad Then what?”
“Ah GTA gets boring after a while, I put Fifa in”.
Me dad was walking up Williamson square last week, and one of two drunks shout to him ‘Ey mate, what day is it?’
Not quite believing someone would ask the question, he asks drunk #1 to repeat it. So me dad replies ‘Tuesday’
drunk #1 turns to drunk #2; ‘See?! I told you it wasn’t Saturday!’
