Overheard by Mick
2 lads on the 61 to Old Swan (years ago)
Lid 1 – ‘Your ma, she’s got a wooden tit.’
Lid 2 – ‘So, your ma……she’s got 2 glass eyes.’
Lid 1 – Your ma’s got wooden legs…..but real feet
This went on for about half an hour
Overheard by Amy
I was gettin on the bus a while back in Tocky and just showed the driver my bus pass an walked down the bus. The driver just shouted to me “HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU TOO!!”
It was February :/
Then 5 mins later the bus started beeping and saying “Warning, engine overheating”
And he just shouted “SO’S THE FUCKING DRIVER!!”
Overheard by Mick
2am by the Bighouse, a couple were arguing, when the girl owned the lad by shouting ‘Shurrup twat, you’re shit in bed.
‘
The ultimate put down
Post by Jo
I worked in Boots one Christmas and went out on my lunch break in my uniform to Principles. A woman stopped me and said, “Hey girl, do you have this top in a size 14?” I replied that I didn’t work there and she said, “Oh, do you do it in black?”
Overheard by Vicky
Lad stood behind me, other lad approaches…
‘Lad’
‘Alrite lad.’
‘What yer bin up to lad?’
‘Nothin lad,workin and shit’
‘You finish early lad don’t yer?’
‘Yeah lad, boss lad init.’
When did we start actually talking like this? hahahaha, I did chuckle!
Overheard by Andy
Girl pushing a pram with her boyfriend next to her walking round the corner by Aldi. Only picked up a bit of the conversation…
“…you want me to hold your hand but when I ask you if I can shag you up the arse…”
To which he promptly received a good right hook to the chops.
Overheard by Pete
2 guys in a queue with a fat bird infront of them. Her phone starts beeping. One guy turns around to his mate, “Run, it’s fucking reversing!!”
Overheard by Mike
Girl 1: ‘Ere’s a picture of our Che.’
Girl 2: ‘Why’s ya dog called Che?’
Girl 1: ‘Dunno, me dad said he named him after Che Guevara.’
Girl 2: ‘Isn’t that a make of perfume?’
